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Making the best of your divorce

Divorce is hard even when you know it's the best course of action for the situation. There will inevitably be hard-to-navigate circumstances and challenges come up, but there are some things you can do to make the best of a difficult situation.

-- Don't turn on your spouse. You're starting to live separate lives, and that obviously means you're going to need to start pulling away from each other. However, establishing a life and identity outside of your ex doesn't mean you have to be antagonistic. Creating a toxic, high-conflict environment won't make your divorce any easier, and it can cause significant damage to your coparenting relationship, which will have a negative effect on the children.

-- Don't engage in your ex's negative behavior. It's hard when the other party is refusing to cooperate or going out of his or her way to make the situation more difficult than it already is. However, engaging in the negativity and responding to incendiary comments or actions will just make the situation worse and bring you down. Try to continue to be civil and treat your ex as if they were a business colleague.

-- Do be honest with your attorney and the courts. It's never a good idea to lie about legal matters, and being untruthful in your statements or attempting to hide assets can backfire greatly. It's important to be completely honest with your attorney throughout the divorce, even if you've done or said something you shouldn't. By doing this, you'll give your attorney the best chance of being able to mitigate any possible damage and continue to represent your best interests.

Source: Divorce Magazine, "9 Common Mistakes Couples Make During Divorce," Stephen McDonough, July 06, 2016

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