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Help your children feel comfortable in your home after a split

After a divorce, your children will usually split their time between your and your ex's home. This can be a difficult transition for a child who has only lived in one home with both parents. It is possible to help your children thrive in both homes if you take the time to plan for their time with you.

One of the most important things that you can do is to make the rules clear from the start. It is much more difficult for children to adapt if they are given cart blanche at first and then are expected to follow rules that get enforced after they spend some time at the home.

Additionally, you need to remember that the children are now having to remember rules for two homes. This can also be a hurdle, and there might be times when they forget the rules at your home. Be patient and remember that this is a learning experience for them as well as both newly-single parents. You might even consider having major rules included in a parenting agreement with the other parent.

Another thing that you can do is to make sure that all children have a space to call their own. Whether this is a full bedroom or a special drawer, letting the kids have a dedicated space can help them feel like your house is home instead of just a place where they visit. If they do have a room of their own, consider letting them decorate it themselves or at least have a say in how it is decorated.

Even when it is difficult, try to remain positive about the child's other home. Children often find pleasure in relaying things to their parents. Try not to have a negative reaction when you learn about what the child does at the other parent's home.

Source: Our Family Wizard, "7 Ways to Help Your Kids Live Happily in Two Houses," accessed Sep. 21, 2017

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